Monday, April 3, 2017

3

Prompt: Write a letter to your 12-year-old self.


Hello Ayesha,

Since you're reading this, it probably means there is a horrible fracture in the time-space continuum and universes are collapsing on themselves because of the paradox this future-past communication has caused. You'll understand that reference in a few years time. Then you'll pat yourself on the back for being clever and making the joke in the first place.

So here's the thing. I'm 25 right now, and no your fascination with round numbers doesn't end. I'm NOT writing to tell you that things get better, the world fixes itself, you will have friends who are good to you, your loneliness and anger are temporary, etc etc. 

I will not say these things to you because without all the angst you will go through now and in the next few years, you wouldn't grow to become me. Your anger, loneliness, attempts at writing, self-righteousness, stubbornness and belief that you know everything about everything, made me. 

All that pain that you've been hoarding, it crystallizes. But I do wonderful things with it. 

You'll grow up really quickly, you know. Wise beyond your years, everyone will say. It's not always a compliment. That feeling you have of being older inside your head? It'll never go away, but it makes me pretty amazing. 

You're gonna see some pretty terrible things in the future. You're seeing some pretty terrible things already. You're allowed to hate them. None of them are okay and they'll change you in ways I don't understand even now. 

You're gonna see and feel some pretty amazing things in the future too. I don't want to be all doom and gloom. 

Here's some advice. Be nicer to Zeina. She deserves it and needs it. 
Be nice to Srishti. She deserves it and needs it even more. 

I'm gonna end this letter now. You're me and so you'll understand why I'm trying not to ramble.

Bye, 
Ayesha

P.S. - I promised I wouldn't tell you to do something that'll change the future, but on the evening that you're with the beautiful boy outside your house chatting to fill an awkward silence, please fucking (oh yeah I curse a lot) kiss him. You definitely definitely will want to, so just do it.


#NaPoWriMo2017

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